On her debut album, U, Me & My Ego, Chxrry is the life of every party. Between braggadocious bars and sultry backdrops, the R&B pop star presents us a reality where desire is queen, every bad decision is the right one, and her worth is non-negotiable. 

Chxrry’s plan for world domination is in full effect. The Toronto-born, LA-based artist has had a landmark year, from the viral success of the self-confidence anthem “Main Character” to working with celebrated designer Mowalola on the visuals, and finally opening for some star-studded contemporaries like FLO, Rema, and Mariah the Scientist. As she connects with Wonderland,  the 29-year-old Canadian is in Hawaii alongside the latter R&B heavyweight for a two-night appearance to promote their new collaborative song, “Bottles & Lights”. This kind of rapid success would rattle even the most steadfast of psyches, but days away from the release of her debut album, U, Me & My Ego, Chxrry is unfazed, focused. “I think right now I’m just in preparation mode,” she says. “Because I feel like everything’s gonna change when this album comes out, and life is gonna get even crazier than it already is. I’m just very excited.”

Born Lydia Habtemariam, Chxrry knew who she was from a very early age, thanks, in part, to her late mother. “My mom was very shameless and very herself, and I think I learned early on in life the power of being an individual, and how important that is…Everything I do, I just try to make it one of one.” Her natural singing talent was honed while growing up in Toronto’s Ethiopian church community, but it wasn’t until she was discovered through a viral video and signed to The Weeknd’s XO Records four years ago that her dreams really came into view. At the time, she was a bored university student looking for some purpose, so she jumped at the chance. “There was no Plan B.”

Chxrry’s artistic essence began in moody, dark R&B, but she found her stride in a sound that matched all her early inspirations, specifically pop and R&B. “[For my inspirations], I think I’ve always said Kanye West, because he truly is my north star. I guess I definitely listened to a lot of Nick Minaj, and her influence is very clear. Lana Del Rey, and a lot of soft rock and soft pop are from Canada. A lot of Michael Bublé, too.” She loves a little bit of everything, and in her own music, draws a line between pop with hip-hop influences and diaristic R&B to create something fresh yet reminiscent. “I think that’s why people are so enamoured by everything I do, because it feels like something you’ve seen, but you’ve never seen before, and if you don’t like this, then you’ll have to like this, and if you don’t like that, then you have to like something else.”

Thematically, Chxrry pulls from her own life experiences and free-spirited nature. “This is not like something I’m cosplaying, or pretending to be. I’ve genuinely always just been a very crazy, fun party girl, and it just naturally comes out in my music. I think now it’s becoming some sort of trendy aesthetic, but real party girls know.” But being a committed party girl is just one side to Chxrry. There’s a tender vulnerability that she uses sparingly but purposefully. On U, Me & My Ego, Chxrry soundtracks her darkest impulses and embraces lofty ambition.

While Chxrry did feel some pressure to create something notable after the success of “Main Character”, she refused to rush the release of her debut album. “I felt like I knew it was time, because my visual world matched my sonic world,” she pinpoints. “Everything I’ve been doing online last year, all the trends, the virality, the hair, the clothes, the songs, all of it was building my avatar.” She didn’t just want the album to match her inspirations; she wanted to create the music that she herself wanted to hear. And once “U, Me & My Ego” was written, she knew it had to be the title. 

“I basically personified my ego, and I just wanted to play on the complicatedness of having an ego and the beauty of it… because these songs are about Chxrry, which is my ego, Lydia, which is me, or ‘You’, which is a guy. All these songs are about one of these things.“ She studied the greats whom she admired, many of whom whose egos have come into question. Mariah Carey, Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Rihanna, Donna Summers, Diana Ross, Barbara Streisand, Celine Dion, Madonna. “I was watching a lot of interviews, doing a lot of research, and just dissecting people with big egos. Why do I love them? Why have I always been drawn to the villain of a show?” While writing the project, she challenged herself to explore those impulses. “I’m just gonna lean so far into myself that whoever’s meant to fuck with me is gonna fuck with me, and they’re gonna love it.”

But egos are fickle things. One day, you’re on top of the world and the next, you’re clutching your pride. On the dreamy and confessional track, “BIBLE,” Chxrry exposes the more fragile parts of said ego as she wonders why a toxic love keeps her stuck. “I love you more than I love myself / I hate that nothing on Earth can help,” she sings. This marks one of the few raw, unguarded moments of reflection on the record. To bring the rest of her otherwise self-assured tracks to life, she relied on a few special collaborators.

When selecting the features, Chxrry knew she had to go big or go home. “I just wanted everyone on my album to be somebody that I consider a trailblazer.” For the club-ready, drill-inspired track, “BADNESS”, she called on Cash Cobain. “I think he’s a true visionary. I think Cash has started a wave and a sound that no one can deny.” And Mariah the Scientist instantly came to mind to complete her song, “Bottles & Lights.” “I think she’s a poet, a genius, you know. One day she’s going to be really honoured for all the music she’s put out and all the great things she’s said in her music.” 

Even though she’s faced pushback for owning her ego, with her music, Chxrry wants to be part of changing the narrative. “I feel like there has to be a world eventually where women can just feel like they’re the shit and they’re not demonised for it. For as long as I can sing, and as long as I can make music, and I have a voice, I want to be somebody who is an advocate for women being very confident.” On her motivation for creating “Bottles and Lights,” she says, “I wanted a song about that feeling when you regain your confidence after being in a very draining situation, and I feel like a lot of women know what that feels like.” 

As she prepares for the tidal wave to come – the album and tour – Chxrry tells it like it is, knows what she wants and is willing to put in the work to get there. “I think my love for art has made me really appreciate [the greats] and appreciate everything that they did, and all the time they put in…I hope that reads with my album, and I hope that reads in everything I do.” 

Listen to the album…

Words – Ozioma Nwabuikwu

Photography – Alexandra Alva