{"id":1244660,"date":"2023-02-14T18:50:00","date_gmt":"2023-02-14T15:50:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/?p=1244660"},"modified":"2023-02-14T18:50:00","modified_gmt":"2023-02-14T15:50:00","slug":"alexandra-roseanu-pandemia-farfuriilor-zburatoare","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/?p=1244660","title":{"rendered":"Alexandra Ro\u0219eanu: Pandemia Farfuriilor Zbur\u0103toare"},"content":{"rendered":"<article class=\"multimedia-container cf\">\n<div class=\"image-caption \"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/images\/articole\/179755.png\" data-caption class=\"fancybox\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/thumb-888?\/articole\/179755.png\" width=\"888\" height=\"499\" alt><span>\u00a0<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n<div class=\"related-articles\">\n<h5 class=\"title\">Articole rela\u021bionate<\/h5>\n<ul class=\"no-bullet\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/opinii\/Scenariul-UFO-Ni-se-pregateste-un-Astro-Christ-messenger-179708\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/thumb-120?\/articole\/179708.jpg\" width=\"120\" height=\"79\" alt><br \/>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tScenariul UFO: Ni se preg\u0103te\u0219te un Astro-Christ-messenger\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/externe\/A-inceput-Razboiul-OZN-urilor-Defectiune-suspecta-la-NORAD-179678\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/thumb-120?\/articole\/179678.jpeg\" width=\"120\" height=\"70\" alt><br \/>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tA \u00eenceput R\u0103zboiul OZN-urilor &#8211; Defec\u021biune suspect\u0103 la NORAD\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"article-text\">\n<p><span data-nosnippet><strong>ActiveNews se confrunt\u0103 cu cenzura<\/strong> pe re\u021bele sociale \u0219i pe internet. Intra\u021bi direct pe site pentru a ne citi \u0219i abona\u021bi-v\u0103 la <a href=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/inregistrare-newsletter\">buletinul nostru gratuit<\/a>. Dac\u0103 dori\u021bi s\u0103 ne sprijini\u021bi, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/sustineactivenews\">orice DONA\u021aIE este binevenit\u0103<\/a>. Doamne, ajut\u0103!<br \/>\n\t\t\t<\/span><\/p>\n<div id=\"asculta-articolul\"><span id=\"preload-asculta-articolul\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/images\/animatie-redare-articol.gif\"><\/span><a class=\"btn-asculta-articolul hide\"><span>ascult\u0103 articolul<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n<p><\/p>\n<div id=\"article-read\">\n<p><span>(Pamflet. \u0218i da &#8230; \u0218i nu! Ca<br \/>\ns\u0103 nu s\u0103ri\u021bi c\u0103 v-a\u021bi pierdut vremea s\u0103 citi\u021bi t\u00e2mpenii, \u00een loc s\u0103<br \/>\naprofunda\u021bi Critica Ra\u021biunii Pure.)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>(PS-ul nu este pamflet.)<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Suntem<br \/>\n \u00een fa\u021ba unui atac iminent venit din galaxii \u00eendep\u0103rtate. \u0218i pentru c\u0103<br \/>\nsunt o conspira\u021bionist\u0103 sadea, asta d\u00e2ndu-mi un aer de omniscien\u021b\u0103<br \/>\nobscur\u0103, v\u0103 deconspir evenimentele ce urmeaz\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>A\u0219adar! Nu intr\u021bi<br \/>\n\u00eenc\u0103 \u00een panic\u0103 pentru c\u0103 prima \u0219i prima dat\u0103 va fi atacat\u0103 China. Are<br \/>\nmai mult\u0103 experien\u021b\u0103 \u00een lupta \u00eempotriva inamicului invizibil, deci \u00eei d\u0103<br \/>\n prestan\u021b\u0103 suficient\u0103 \u00een fa\u021ba acestei situa\u021bii de criz\u0103. Vom vedea<br \/>\nfilmulete TikTok cu chinezi care vor fi r\u0103pi\u021bi de c\u0103tre Farfurii<br \/>\nZburatoare Neidentificate (FZN), pe lungimea de lumin\u0103 a unei raze<br \/>\nviolet.<\/p>\n<p>Ne vom speria, ne vom acoperi ochii, dar la televizor,<br \/>\nacelea\u0219i busturi de pe vreme lu&#8217; reposatu&#8217; Calache19, ne vor spune s\u0103 ne<br \/>\n calm\u0103m, s\u0103 \u00eembr\u0103\u021bi\u0219\u0103m un chinez r\u0103pit. Imaginile din China vor<br \/>\n\u00eenconjura mapamondul, dup\u0103 care, la o lun\u0103 va apare primul caz de r\u0103pire<br \/>\n \u00een Codogno (Italia), unde Gianluca (zugrav, 56 ani) se \u00eentorcea de la<br \/>\nBar Sport unde pariase c\u0103 Sampdoria va pierde cu 4-1 \u00een fa\u021ba lui Napoli,<br \/>\n dar sup\u0103rat c\u0103 pierduse la pariuri, a b\u0103ut pu\u021bin cam mult iar de atunci<br \/>\n nu a mai fost v\u0103zut. Pesemne c\u0103 \u00eel r\u0103piser\u0103 extratere\u0219trii. Alt\u0103<br \/>\nexplica\u021bie nu exist\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>Organizatia Mondial\u0103 a S\u0103n\u0103t\u0103\u021bii va declara Pandemie de R\u0103piri.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cencetul<br \/>\n cu \u00eencetul dispari\u021biile se \u00eenmul\u021besc \u00een lumea &#8220;civilizat\u0103&#8221;, mai pu\u021bin<br \/>\n\u00een Belarus care nu crede \u00een r\u0103piri, le consider\u0103 boala psihic\u0103, la fel<br \/>\n\u0219i \u021b\u0103rile africane care nu au televizor, a\u0219adar nu au nici \u00een ce s\u0103<br \/>\ncread\u0103, nici de ce se teme.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cen USA, Joe Biden va ap\u0103rea zilnic la televizor \u00een urma stabilirii unei Task Force pentru a contracara disparitiile subite.<\/p>\n<p>Din<br \/>\n China spre USA se face trafic de informa\u021bii \u0219i se transmit detalii<br \/>\ndespre r\u0103piri. Oamenii de \u0219tiin\u021b\u0103 scot la lumin\u0103 un studiu care<br \/>\ndemonstreaz\u0103 c\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2lnirea vizual\u0103 dintre un extraterestru \u0219i un uman \u00eel<br \/>\n contamineaz\u0103 pe cel din urm\u0103 cu boala &#8220;Farfurid23&#8221;, ceea ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103<br \/>\n va fi r\u0103pit cur\u00e2nd.<\/p>\n<p>Buletinele de stiri vor da tot mai multe<br \/>\nraporturi de cazuri de Farfurid23. P\u00e2n\u0103 \u0219i cei \u00eenc\u0103 ner\u0103pi\u021bi vor fi<br \/>\ndiagnostica\u021bi drept infecta\u021bi cu Farfurid23, dar asimptomatici, adic\u0103<br \/>\nvor fi refuza\u021bi de extratere\u0219tri. Apar primele b\u0103nuieli asupra mirosului<br \/>\n nepl\u0103cut din gur\u0103, acesta fiind motivul reject\u0103rii extraterestre.<br \/>\nOricum, fiind contamina\u021bi, trebuie s\u0103 stea departe de pensionari pentru<br \/>\nc\u0103 \u00eei pot infecta. Vor primi de la stat o periu\u021b\u0103 de dinti nou-nou\u021b\u0103<br \/>\npentru a se sp\u0103la pe dinti 14 zile.<\/p>\n<p>Fiecare \u021bar\u0103 adopt\u0103 legi menite s\u0103 aplatizeze curba de r\u0103piri.<\/p>\n<p>Ultimele decizii venite direct de la OMS+UE se stabilesc prin decret \u00een fiecare \u021bar\u0103:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; R\u0103pirile dup\u0103 orele 18 punct se intensific\u0103, astfel se declar\u0103 stare de asediu p\u00e2n\u0103 diminea\u021ba la orele 6 punct.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Oamenii trebuie s\u0103 poarte o masc\u0103 pe ochi c\u00e2nd ies din cas\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211;<br \/>\n Medicamentele de vedere, vitaminele A \u0219i E, c\u00e2t si morcovii sunt<br \/>\ninterzi\u0219i pentru a nu facilita vederea Farfuriilor Sbur\u0103toare.<\/p>\n<p>Va<br \/>\n \u00eencepe Campionatul Mondial de Orbire. Sub sloganul: &#8220;Orbe\u0219te ast\u0103zi, ca<br \/>\n s\u0103 po\u021bi s\u0103 vezi m\u00e2ine. Un ultim sacrificiu!&#8221; Oamenii vor vorbi \u00eentre ei<br \/>\n care va fi cel mai eficient \u0219i rapid mod de orbire.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cencep s\u0103 apar\u0103<br \/>\n\u0219i primii sceptici, cei ce vor z\u0103d\u0103rnici combaterea r\u0103pirilor si<br \/>\norbirii. La televizor vor fi cataloga\u021bi drept &#8220;Anti-Farfurid23&#8221; sau<br \/>\n&#8220;No-UFO&#8221;, &#8220;No-orbire&#8221;. Ace\u0219tia sus\u021bin c\u0103 nu cred \u00een UFO. Cetepe apare la<br \/>\n televizor cu o spumi\u021b\u0103 prelins\u0103 \u00een col\u021bul gurii, s\u0103 \u00eei \u00eenjure.<\/p>\n<p>Oamenii vor fi sf\u0103tui\u021bi la televizor s\u0103 nu se mai priveasc\u0103 \u00een ochi, ci s\u0103-\u0219i dea &#8220;buna ziua&#8221; privind la pantofii celuilalt.<\/p>\n<p>Ursula<br \/>\n von der Leyen ne va \u00eenv\u0103\u021ba cum s\u0103 privim corect. Ea va face exerci\u021bii<br \/>\nde privire \u00een oglinda toaletei gender fluid a Comisiei Europene \u00een timp<br \/>\nce fredoneaz\u0103 &#8220;Oda bucuriei&#8221;. Pe facebook vor ap\u0103rea meme-uri despre cei<br \/>\n care privesc pe sub nas. Ace\u0219ti mici impostori, care z\u0103d\u0103rnicesc, vor<br \/>\nfi chema\u021bi Ionei \u0219i se va presupune c\u0103 sunt sigur adep\u021bi al teoriei<br \/>\nP\u0103m\u00e2ntului Plat.<\/p>\n<p>Ni se va spune sa nu mai privim nici icoanele pentru c\u0103 putem s\u0103-i infect\u0103m pe ceilal\u021bi enoria\u0219i.<\/p>\n<p>Dintr-o<br \/>\n dat\u0103 apar \u00een magazine ochelari cu sticla tulbure. \u00cen magazine se va<br \/>\ninstala plexiglas netransparent. Singurul mod de a mai privi o persoan\u0103<br \/>\numan\u0103 va fi prin intermediul internetului sau ecranului televizorului,<br \/>\nc\u0103ci privitul \u00een ochi va fi ini\u021bial limitat p\u00e2n\u0103 seara, apoi interzis \u00een<br \/>\n afara locuin\u021bei tale.<\/p>\n<p>Panica \u0219i teroarea vor cuprinde tot<br \/>\numanul, dar extraterestri r\u0103pesc f\u0103r\u0103 mil\u0103, a\u0219adar este pentru binele<br \/>\nt\u0103u \u0219i al aproapelui. Se creeaz\u0103 celule de criz\u0103, care \u00eentr-un final<br \/>\ng\u0103sesc rezolvarea.<\/p>\n<p><span>&#8230;<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Solu\u021bia apare de la o companie farmaceutica american\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>Este<br \/>\n o pastil\u0103 de \u00eence\u021bo\u0219are temporar\u0103 a privirii timp de 24 de ore, numit\u0103<br \/>\n&#8220;Cataract-24h&#8221;. Asta p\u00e2n\u0103 ce oamenii de \u0219tiin\u021b\u0103 vor dezvolta un vaccin<br \/>\ncare s\u0103 orbeasc\u0103 omul. Oamenii c\u0103rora le pas\u0103, sper\u0103 \u0219i aplaud\u0103 la orele<br \/>\n 6 pe&#8217;nserat, noile solu\u021bii. Se vor face c\u00e2nt\u0103ri \u0219i dansuri care s\u0103<br \/>\nsl\u0103veasc\u0103 eroii din linia \u00eent\u00e2i a orbirii voluntare, dar necesare.<br \/>\nJerusalema va fi din nou dansul oficial al asistentelor legate la ochi.<\/p>\n<p>La<br \/>\n \u0219coal\u0103, copiii vor fi supu\u0219i procesului necesar de orbire timp de opt<br \/>\nore consecutiv. Un succes r\u0103sun\u0103tor \u00een lupta \u00eend\u00e2rjit\u0103 cu vederea.<br \/>\nPentru a intra \u00een restaurant vei fi nevoit s\u0103 faci dovada orbirii, iar<br \/>\np\u00e2n\u0103 te vei a\u0219eza la mas\u0103 vei fi obligat s\u0103 por\u021bi masca pe ochi.<\/p>\n<p>Vei primi un certificat de orbire care s\u0103-\u021bi permit\u0103 accesul \u00een via\u021ba social\u0103.<\/p>\n<p><span>&#8230;<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Dupa<br \/>\n doi ani de ur\u0103 \u00eentre taberele NO-FZN \u0219i tab\u0103ra &#8220;Stai acas\u0103. Orbe\u0219te<br \/>\npentru bunica&#8221; se pare c\u0103 numarul r\u0103pirilor de FZN se diminueaz\u0103, iar<br \/>\nbuletinele de \u0219tiri \u00ee\u0219i \u00eendreapt\u0103 aten\u021bia c\u0103tre anun\u021buri din sfera<br \/>\nnoului normal cum ar fi schimb\u0103rile climatice \u0219i m\u00e2ncatul de gunoi<br \/>\nmenajer, ca mod de a salva, din nou, planeta.<\/p>\n<p>Cei orbiti voluntar vor r\u0103m\u00e2ne sup\u0103ra\u021bi pe cei neorbi\u021bi pentru c\u0103 neorbirea lor a prelungit prea mult starea de urgen\u021b\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>\u0218i anii vor trece r\u00e2nd pe r\u00e2nd, iar c\u00e2nd va fi prea, prea, prea t\u00e2rziu, oamenii vor deschide ochii.<\/p>\n<p><span>PS.<\/span> C\u00e2nd vom \u00eenceta s\u0103 ne mai \u00eengrozim, c\u00e2nd ne vom opri din a ne sim\u021bi<br \/>\nvictime ale cuiva, c\u00e2nd vom \u00een\u021belege o dat\u0103 pentru totdeauna c\u0103 NIMENI,<br \/>\nNICIODAT\u0102 nu \u00ee\u021bi poate face r\u0103u f\u0103r\u0103 acordul t\u0103u,, c\u00e2nd toate fricile<br \/>\nvor disp\u0103rea, ve\u021bi fi LIBERI. Libertatea este sacr\u0103 \u0219i sf\u00e2nt\u0103, orice<br \/>\nform\u0103 de \u00eengr\u0103dire este inexistent\u0103 \u00een ochii unui om care \u00ee\u0219i cunoa\u0219te<br \/>\nmenirea, este lucid \u0219i convins c\u0103 peste el se afl\u0103 doar Dumnezeu, nimeni<br \/>\n altcineva. Restul sunt pove\u0219ti cu coco\u0219ul ro\u0219u care ar trebui s\u0103<br \/>\nst\u00e2rneasc\u0103 r\u00e2sul, hohote de r\u00e2s, nicidecum mirarea, nu groaza, nu frica,<br \/>\n nu \u00eentreb\u0103ri retorice de genul: &#8220;Ai v\u0103zut ce ne fac \u0103\u0219tia?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>\u0102\u0219tia<br \/>\nfac TOT ce pot.Tu, umanule, chiar faci TOT ce po\u021bi? Dac\u0103 da &#8230; (s\u0103<br \/>\ncontinue fiecare dup\u0103 chipul \u0219i asem\u0103narea proprie pe linia punctat\u0103)<\/p>\n<p><span>Cum spunea bunica mea: dac\u0103 vrei s\u0103 \u00een\u021belegi ceva pe lumea asta deschide ochii, nu c\u0103sca gura!<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/article>\n<p> Source URL: https:\/\/www.activenews.ro\/opinii\/Alexandra-Roseanu-Pandemia-Farfuriilor-Zburatoare-179755<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0 Articole rela\u021bionate Scenariul UFO: Ni se preg\u0103te\u0219te un Astro-Christ-messenger A \u00eenceput R\u0103zboiul OZN-urilor &#8211; Defec\u021biune suspect\u0103 la NORAD ActiveNews se confrunt\u0103 cu cenzura pe re\u021bele sociale \u0219i pe internet. Intra\u021bi direct pe site pentru a ne citi \u0219i abona\u021bi-v\u0103 la buletinul nostru gratuit. Dac\u0103 dori\u021bi s\u0103 ne sprijini\u021bi, orice DONA\u021aIE este binevenit\u0103. Doamne, ajut\u0103! [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[89],"tags":[98],"class_list":["post-1244660","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-romania","tag-activenews-ro"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1244660","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1244660"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1244660\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1244660"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1244660"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/analyse.optim.biz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1244660"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}